If you asked me nine years ago, success often involved images that conveyed money, power, and respect. It was very theatrical. 

Thanks to my stomach, I realized a truer, clearer, and more real definition of success. For some people, those images are worth everything, including their health. For me, I realized that they meant next to nothing. I would choose my health over images of success any day.

While an image of success is loud, real success is quiet. It often reveals itself not in bursts of ecstasy, but in moments of peace and calm. It appears in the form of a pain you don’t even feel because you prevented it. 

You’ll know you’re successful when you can sleep soundly at night, with a clear conscience. 

You’re not being driven around by your emotions all the time, and instead you put yourself in a position to think clearly and calmly. 

The people around you love you, more for who you are, and less for what you can do for them (even though you are capable of doing a lot). 

You care less about impressing other people, and instead you want to live a life true to your own values. For you, there are many ways to feel happy. 

Thanks to Marc Randolph for writing a definition of success that resonated, which I’m excerpting below:

I’ve worked hard, for my entire career, to keep my life balanced with my job. In my book, I write about my Tuesday date nights with my wife. For over thirty years, I had a hard cut-off on Tuesdays. Rain or shine, I left at exactly 5 pm and spent the evening with my best friend. We would go to a movie, have dinner, or just go window-shopping downtown together.

Nothing got in the way of that. No meeting, no conference call, no last-minute question or request. If you had something to say to me on Tuesday afternoon at 4:55, you had better say it on the way to the parking lot. If there was a crisis, we are going to wrap it up by 5:00.

Those Tuesday nights kept me sane. And they put the rest of my work in perspective.

I resolved a long time ago to not be one of those entrepreneurs on their 7th startup and their 7th wife. In fact, the thing I’m most proud of in my life is not the companies I started, it’s the fact that I was able to start them while staying married to the same woman; having my kids grow up knowing me and (best as I can tell) liking me, and being able to spend time pursuing the other passions in my life.

That’s my definition of success.