Never take offense that you have to negotiate

Here’s something I wish I knew a decade ago (or even just five years ago):

This is the other huge mistake people make when they start negotiating. They take offense at what’s being offered because they feel it’s an unfair representation of what they’ve put in.

Please understand this: negotiations are not personal. Again, I don’t care if you’re dealing with a longtime business partner, a friend, or a family member: the other person is never going to start at a number you think is fair. It’s just not how the process works. They’re always going to start at a lower number and then come up if you push back. Just how high they come up depends on how good a negotiator you are. But they’re never going to start at that number…

The key is I never react emotionally. Even if the energy I’m projecting is of someone who is pissed off and about to walk away, internally I’m cool. I’m just waiting to see how my energy is received. If I push and push, and the other side still won’t move, then I will walk away. But more often than not, a few pushes get me to where I want to be. And then we seal the deal. Once it’s done, it’s like all the posturing and threatening never even happened. Everyone hugs, raises a toast, and talks about how excited they are to be in business together….

You should always fight for your worth, but never take offense that you have to fight in the first place. When you do that, you’re moving off of emotion. It might not be fair, but to get what you want, you can only move off of strategy. Anything less will leave you hustling backward.

50 Cent, Hustle Harder, Hustle Smarter

(For eagle-eyed readers, the first mistake is never get fixated on a number. Highly recommend the book—I prefer the audiobook, I use

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