It’s best to attach the value of your work based on something that’s within your control. This could mean a way of doing things, a philosophy, or a set of values—or all three. Championship NFL coach Bill Walsh would call this a Standard of Performance. 

Here are some things you don’t control: How other people think or feel, how somebody else will receive your work, how well your work will perform in the marketplace. 

When you try to control these things, you just end up worrying. When you focus on worrying, you’re not focused on the work.

The best way to shift your focus back to the work is to relinquish results. Perhaps it’s to even lower your expectations, and apply a regular effort to something—because you know putting in too much effort might backfire.

Do your best with what you have. Make something for somebody, take their feedback, and improve the work. Focus on being generous and giving—not on feeling good about yourself.

As Seth Godin writes in The Practice, “We are in free fall. Always. Attachment pushes us to grab ahold of something…. Becoming unattached doesn’t eliminate our foundation. It gives us one.” 

When you focus on the things that are within your control and excelling at them, you’re going to get what you want. Bill Walsh knew this, which is why he titled his book, “The Score Takes Care of Itself.”