My father has a saying in Cantonese, which roughly translates into, “You can’t trust people, you can only trust God.” This saying came to mind in last night’s episode of Ted Lasso.

Betrayal is one of the most painful emotions. We’ve seen Ted Lasso deal with it, in different orders of magnitude, each season. I don’t know how they’re going to top last night’s, though I do find the theme incisive.

In a show that’s a proponent of believing in people, it also means putting yourself out there for when people not only (inevitably!) let you down, but also for when people purposely and maliciously betray your trust. As 50 Cent writes:

Getting betrayed is different. You don’t get a great war story out of it. I’ve never heard of someone getting hyped to tell their friends, “Yo, you won’t believe this, but I just got backstabbed by my mans!” There are no stripes earned for that shit. When you open yourself up to someone, either financially or emotionally, and they go left on you, it’s a different kind of pain, even more dramatic than a stickup kid physically taking something from you. Like Malcolm X said, “To me, the thing that is worse than death is betrayal. You see, I could conceive death, but I could not conceive betrayal.”

There’s nothing fun about betrayal; not only that, it makes it incredibly difficult to believe again. I do like what 50 has to say about it though:

Because I find betrayal so painful, I put incredible thought and consideration into the people who surround me.

Not only that—but paying attention to how those people are changing, what pressures they’re going through, and their inner character.

You’re not going to get far if you don’t put yourself out there. 

But you’re also in for a world of pain if you surround yourself with people who care so little about others, or are so self-interested and short-sighted, that they will hurt you to get what they want.