Category: Turning Stories
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Make space for projects that show momentum, by quitting the ones that don’t
One of my friends is an entrepreneur with a wide ranging portfolio that spans real estate, franchises, ecommerce stores, and software. Some of these businesses have seen dramatic growth. Whenever we chat, he’ll describe a new business—often two or three—that he’s directly working on. I pay attention because I always learn something new. Sometimes, I…
Herbert Lui
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Restraint, and a better no
At the start of each year, some people choose a word or motto intended to be a theme. I’m usually not one of them. However, the word, “Restraint,” came to me last year, so I made that a focus. It has remained the word for this year. While I’d made progress, I felt like there…
Herbert Lui
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Leadership looks sweet and tastes bitter
One way to define a leader is someone who understands what needs to be done, and gets it done. Another way to say this: a leader sets a goal, makes a plan to achieve it, and executes on that plan. A person doesn’t need a job title or power to become a leader. They take…
Herbert Lui
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Stacking the deck to win
What’s the most important thing an executive coach can do to succeed? Choosing the right clients. More specifically, choosing to only work with leaders who demonstrate a high potential of success before the engagement. In order to do this, the coach needs to qualify potential clients very intentionally. They decline to work with anyone who…
Herbert Lui
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The lion and the rat
Here’s a good fable from Jean de La Fontaine: A Rat, in quite a foolish way, Crept from his hole between a Lion’s paws;The king of animals showed on that day His royalty, and never snapped his jaws.The kindness was not unrepaid;Yet, who’d have thought a Lion would need aid From a poor Rat? Soon…
Herbert Lui
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A bit of unconditional love, for the things you make
Raymond Carver, a writing professor and author of short stories, had friends who published their work and apologized for it not being very good. “It would have been better if I’d taken the time,” they would say. Raymond responded: I wanted to say to my friend, for heaven’s sake go do something else. There have…
Herbert Lui
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Stay with it
Imagine going up a roller coaster. The butterflies in your stomach are fluttering. There’s no turning back, you’re buckled into the seat. Without you realizing it, your breathing has grown shallow. Excitement, anxiety, and fear, all mixed up into one. The feeling crescendos as your seat gets higher and higher up into the air. All…
Herbert Lui
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Just don’t it
In the late 1980s, an ad agency created a marketing campaign for Nike. The commercial featured an 80-year-old man running every morning, who says, “People ask me how I keep my teeth from chattering all the time. I leave them in my locker.” Then, a slogan flashed on the screen, “Just do it.” This phrase…
Herbert Lui
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The courage to tell (yourself) a new story
A young man discusses his latest challenge with a philosopher. Whenever he sees another young person’s story of success in a newspaper, he feels a strong sense of envy and frustration. He feels inferior, like he’s less than the other person. He’s reminded of his social standing, his modest education, and even the pimples on…
Herbert Lui
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Accept, commit, and endure
Two related, and really useful, ideas from two psychologists: You don’t need to feel better—prepared, ready, in control—before you do the difficult thing. All life asks of you is that you participate. When you avoid negative emotions, you make them feel stronger. Steven C. Hayes explores experiential avoidance and acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) in…
Herbert Lui